In India, many married couples endure years of indignity and pain to put on acts of togetherness rather than risk the slander and disrepute that a broken marriage often leads to in these parts of the world.

As an Indian, no mater how much I pride myself on being liberal and progressive, the notion of divorce seems jarring and foreign. Like something western and for some reason, particularly American. Possibly because American movies, sitcoms and soaps have been so pervasive here and most people of my generation first heard of dating, divorce and single parenthood through these channels. And acts of infidelity were either rare or severely hushed up. Growing up, very few of us actually witnessed broken marriages and separations first-hand.

I believe that life in America is structured in a way that makes commitment and fidelity difficult, especially for men. It’s a society where women are constantly ‘commoditized’ – strip clubs, hooters’ girls, playboy bunnies, escort services and so on. To me, this kind of hyper-sexual culture driven by commercialism could cause even a hard-working, honest Joe to slip. I am not surprised that Tiger Woods, with all that power and wealth at his disposal gave in to the temptation, numerous times. What really surprises me is the way the American media and society has reacted since the news broke.

No Britneys with Bindis
In India, which still remains to a very large extent socially conservative, we take it for granted that a man-–any kind of man, not just good-looking and young –-with power and money will have many women. It is not a truth we openly accept, but it is an assumption we all make of those rich and famous. And yet, we don’t bother to confirm those assumptions. Here, nobody cares what a celebrity does in his or her private time – off the field, be it sports or politics. Movies stars’ lives are speculated about, but just a bit.

Author Amrita Chowdhury has returned to India after a long stint as a student and professional in America, she touches upon the cultural differences and readjusting to her home country after many years away in her popular art crime thriller Faking It. Amrita says, “The US has always expected its public figures to be larger than life and above temptations. Perhaps hypocritical, perhaps indicative of a latent puritanical streak, but they are expected to be role models for lesser mortals,” and adds, “Politicians have lost positioning over petty peccadilloes. Of course, in Tiger’s case, it has not been a matter of avoiding temptation, rather giving in to almost every temptation that came his way. His women are crawling out of the woodwork!”

In India, the mistresses wouldn’t have been let off the hook so easily. So much has been said about the subjugation of women in the country and definitely women would be disgraced and vilified if they spoke openly about their affairs with married men. So while a lot of us hanker after fame and money not many would do so at the cost of their personal reputation. Although that has begun to change with TV shows like Sach ka saamna, an Indian adaptation of the American game show Moment of Truth and reality shows on the Indian MTV where youngsters are rewarded for acting wild and crazy. The country has its share of young, beautiful actresses and celebs who probably drink, sleep around and smoke-up, but we don’t have versions of Lindsay Lohans or Britney Spears willing to put up a show for the media. The Tabloid culture is almost non-existent. And while news channels have been accused of being sensationalist – it’s rarely ever at the cost of a famous person.

As an Indian, it’s impossible for me to fathom why Tiger Wood’s affairs should matter so much to the American public. I look to a few Indians who have lived in both parts of the world to help me understand.

From across the Atlantic
Divya, an Indian graduate student in America says, “The American society, as open as it may appear to the world, certainly has its share of traditional mindset and conservative public opinion.” But she adds that the media is partly to blame too.

Jigar Shah, a Private Equity Professional based in New York City, puts most of the blame on the media and the blatant commercialism that drives it, “The media just played it up, when a story like this breaks the competition to sell news revolving around it is unbridled.”

Karthik Nandyal, an ex-Wall Street banker, who grew up in India but lived in the US for about 15 years says that his conservative Indian roots were shaken only when he went to Europe. “I worked in the US for about a decade before going to London and to see that they have nude women center-spreads in their tabloids was a shock to me,” he says. “I have found and still find US very puritanical.”

As an outsider, in conservative Asia, America might seem like a liberal, playground for the sexes, but I – and many others like me – begin to question our assumptions when a scandal like this erupts. As Divya says, “America, to its credit, is surprisingly conservative when it comes to upholding the core values its society is built upon.”

Mutual Exchange
Indians could learn a thing or two from American outrage at the personal transgressions of its powerful people. Our nonchalance about the personal values of those in the political arena probably needs the most to change. As Karthik says, “In the USA Professional integrity is tightly bound to personal values.” When corruption is rampant at all levels, it makes sense to question what businesses a local leader is involved in, especially when he is distributing vehicles, including SUVs and luxury cars, to hundreds of his supporters  or when religious riots that have killed hundreds have happened under the watch of local governments in the past, we should probably be more careful to check if a savvy politician is a religious fanatic in his personal life. Or question our own values, if we continue to love an actor who was arrested for murdering an innocent slum-dweller while driving drunk and killing an endangered animal.

Tiger Woods: Back on Top

And there are a few things the American public could learn from Indians. We understand that extraordinary, successful people can sometimes be far more human than the rest of us. We like to let them be, make their own personal mistakes and learn from them. Or not. Sometimes, what they have achieved is of greater importance. That’s why we protest when Hollywood announces a film on the alleged affair between Nehru and Edwina Mountbatten – the wife of British India’s last Viceroy. Why not make a film on Nehru’s achievements in leading the ‘third world’ on the path of peace? And how despite 11 Nominations, the Nobel Peace Prize eluded him?

Bill Clinton should have apologized to Hillary about Monica and to the rest of America, only about the misuse of government premises. And Tiger Woods needn’t have apologized to anybody, except Elin, and that too whenever he was ready.

Yes, if Tiger Woods were in India, he would only be known for his golf. Nothing else would have mattered.

Related Blogs

• 'The Times' reports on gurus, sex, money, power « Sathya Sai Baba …
• Chinese officials warned of allure of sex, power

Loading...